We all thought there would be a computer in our brains one day — well now, the computer *is* the brain.


Apparently, a group of Swiss scientists have decided to play God and create what they’re calling a “bioprocessor” out of human brain organoids.


“FinalSpark claims its Neuroplatform is the world’s first online platform delivering access to biological neurons in vitro. Moreover, bioprocessors like this ‘consume a million times less power than traditional digital processors,’ the company says,” per Tom’s Hardware.



I won’t pretend like I know how all of this works, but it does seem weird. Like, I understand that using human brains to compute things is less energy intensive than computers, but 1) that’s literally The Matrix; and 2) it rings a *bit* like “the cheapest way to build things is to use slaves.”


That may be true, but it just ain’t right!


Obviously there’s a world of difference between that latter point and reality, though it is weird to see that these human brain cells have eyes and can sense light. But hey, scientists assure us that they die really quickly, so the chances of them developing any sort of meaningful sentience is low.


Plus, if you don’t have a moral problem with this whole thing, access is just $500 per month — let’s see who can be the first to make the human brain run Doom!