Ayo,

I leave this site for 2 lousy months, and the fucking dregs of blogging society move in like goddamn chinamen on a stray dog.

What the fuck people?  How are you letting these miserably unfunny bi-curious tree hugging definitely fat and ugly motherfuckers post so irreverently without any manner of badgering or ridicule?!  In my day, people would shit on you so hard that you'd have to change your fucking username!  WHAT IS GOOD!?

So here's a list (only a few mind you, i don't have time to list them all i don't want carpal tunnel because i need my hands for masturbating 17 times an hour) of some of the more douchey posters just in recent days.

Panic_Away -- The Linden Method

- Are you fucking serious.  No one cares.  Let me say that again. NO ONE CARES.  Are you really trying to come onto a site that posts pictures of vaginas with beards and fake eyeballs photoshopped on them and trying to have a conversation on social commentary?  Jesus Christ you are DENSE.  Someone needs to take a shit in your breakfast just to give you the hint that you are not worth the space you inhabit.  I have taken more interesting pisses than you.  And considering i had the tip of my cock bitten off by a transexual hooker 5 years ago, that's quite a feat.

BJBEAD - bjbead

-  I didn't even read this, i don't have to, because there's 1 of 2 things going on here.

1.  You're a spammer, and one day God will have his retribution by making you birth children that have either down syndrome, cerebal palsy, or both.

2.  You're a 35 year old virgin who lives in your parent's basement.  I don't really need to elaborate here, that's just terrible and you should hang yourself like the Caine from Kung-fu (too soon?)

X22tizzle - Anything he writes.

- I tore into this guy a little bit on another blog, but seriously, are you under the impression that anything you write will be funny because you're like the coolest one of your friends at home?  Being the coolest one of your friends is like being the smartest retard.  Seriously, you hanging out with your friends is like watching a bunch of autistic kids trying to fuck a door knob.  Everything about you makes me want to burn down all buildings in a 50 block radius just to be sure that if you're anywhere near me i've at least made an attempt to kill you.

Rethink - stupid title.

-  You should rethink being a member of this site, because I'm gonna make you rethink your sexuality at least once every 20 minutes.  I don't even remember the title of your blog but i remembered your name.  I refuse to use the effort of moving my mouse to click the back button to see what you wrote, because i dont' want to waste the energy from the food i just ate on doing that because you're that useless.  You should invest in one of those parachutes filled with silverware and then strap a camera to your helmet and jump off a building, pull the cord, and go down in history as the dumbest motherfucker who ever tried to fly.  God help you, and god help anyone who knows you outside of this site.

Justin Boss - ok

Ok.

That's it, you're all worse than chlamydia at senior prom.  I once had a conversation with a dead rabbit on the side of the road, and his contributions of escaping bodily gasses were more worthwhile than anything any of you have typed.  You make me contemplated bodily mutation as a viable form of distraction from your terrible and shameful blogs.

I aware all of you no points, and I hope God gives up on the whole forgiveness thing just for one day and sends you all to burning, dark, fire and brimstone, pitchfork up your ass hell.

Fuck you all,

Mega