let me first start by saying that i didnt lose my virginity for a long time because i was afraid of going to hell. it took me 22 years to realize i was brainwashed by christianity before i said fuckit and got some. so up until then penises were a scarry thing,,,never to be looked at or touched or thought about. so you can imagine my shock when i unexpectitly came into contact with some.

#1 the first PENIS i saw was in 4th grade. this red haired kid named kenny who sat by me pulled his dick out one day and tapped me on the shoulder. he didnt have a fire crotch cause we were only 9 but it was very pale and i could see all the viens in it. sick. i told my mommy cause she told me to tell her if i was ever being molested and kenny got suspended.

#2 when i was 16 i was driving in the mall parking lot and this guy was standing outside his car putting his shirt on. but he had no pants or underware and his penis was smaller than kennys. i couldnt believe what i was seeing was real cause i was so shocked so i just drove off.

#3 when i was 17 i was eating at the mcdonals with my friend and all the pedophiles used to hang out at that time cause the highschool kids would go there on lunch. this old ass dude, like 70 sat down next to us. he was wering real short nut-hugger shorts and he reached up them and pulled his balls out for us to see.

#4 after i graduated i worked as a casheir at the k-mart and as i was ringing up this old lady some guy came up to the register and put his penis there for me to scan. i called security.

#5 i already blogged about the naked guy who masturbated on my laundry

#6 i was walking downtown one day and this black guy just pulled his dick out and started pissing everywhere. he was waving it around and people started screaming.

and that is my life story of PENISES. even after all the scarry things that have happend i eventually grew to love penises very much.