Troll-wife just had surgery to get a plate removed from her arm.  She talked to my son about it.  When my son asked my daughter if she wanted to talk to mommy:  "No."

"But mommy just had her surgery."

"I know."

My son gave me the phone.  "My daughter doesn't even want to talk to me.  She doesn't even want to know how I'm doing after my surgery."

"Well... you did grill her about what she wanted to do and where she wanted to stay after the divorce.  You even asked her why and borderline interrogated her when you didn't get the answer you wanted."

"I didn't borderline interrogate her."

"So you full-on interrogated her?"

*Much screechy bitching and a bogus attempt to spin the conversation that I already heard from my daughter ensues*

She went on to tell me that I was a terrible father and a terrible husband, that I did nothing but lay on the couch after smoking pot (once again, napping while she's conscious is a damnable offense.  What's more, I rarely smoked anything before the kids where in bed, and only in moderation).  About the napping, I retorted "This comes from the woman who slept 16 hours a day through my whole marriage."

"Because I have lupus, you fucker."

"Who do you think was watching the kids while you were sleeping 16 hours a day?  The heavy smoker?  Why don't you turn that laser insight on yourself.  All your criticisms of me mirror your own faults."

*More screeching accusations*

She ended up slamming the phone down on me.

Do I feel bad that this happened when she was recovering from minor surgery?  Fuck no.  Not at all.  She dumped me right after I had major surgery and had a giant, black, swollen ballsack and had pumps and drains hanging out of me.  Fuck her.

After she slammed the phone down on me, against all good judgement, I texted her this:

"I didn't smoke for the first two plus years we lived here, asshole. 

You ended the marriage with no ultimatum, no 'if/then' because you wanted to.  The end of our marriage was all about you.  Now I thank you for it.  I really do.  I'm totally done with your self centered ass. 

You tell me to be married to myself and be alone because that's what you fear is going to happen to you.  Don't worry about me.  I don't have to go to clubs and flop down on my back to get attention from the opposite sex.  I'm doing fine. 

Fuck you for saying that your problems with *daughter* are rooted with me.  I advocate for you with both of my kids.  Take responsibility for the consequences of your actions.  Don't blame me for them."

I wish I could feel better about her losing it and reaping what she's sown with her kids.  I don't.  I just feel disappointment, a touch of contempt, but mostly just sorry for her.