Hey all. Our good buddy Eshel really got me thinking today about creativity and shit like that, so taking note from him, I decided to entertain the little one this afternoon with a home-made puppet of my own.

Apparently, skill is necessary.

I got a bunch of felt scraps from the nephew's box of crafts we keep here, sewed the pieces together to make a hand-puppet shape, then got to work. My sewing skills suck pure, durty anus, so the thing would only fit the dainty hand of a child...no big deal. We'll work with it, I figured. I had limited resources fit for the puppet, so I attempted to improvise some things. We had bottle-caps for eyes (glued on), some more felt for facial ecpressions (also glued) and this really cool looking bit of coil for strange hand-monster antenna.  I slaped the thing together while she napped for a super-awesome surprise when she awoke.

It didn't go as well as I'd hoped.

When she got up, we did the change/bottle bit, then went to play-time. I pulled out the "puppet" for her to see, which totally freaked her out. It was a purpple-ish colour, so that made it look a little foolish. The glue left gross, crusty streaks down the puppet where the shit had spilled off the pieces or drops hit it. The mouth fell off when I picked it up, the eyes were a bad idea, as she pulled one right off and tried to stick it in her mouth. (Choking hazards! Damn I'm retarded!!) I pulled the other one off as to not tempt fate further, but saw she was getting a little uninterested. I tried to go for the big save by showing her the "awesome" coil antenna on the head. I pulled it back and let it spring in on itself...

The fucking thing cut me.

In a fit of rage, I threw out the "puppet", dressed the little girl in her winter coat and boots, headed off to Toys R Us and let her pick out a new item to make up for my lack of artistic construction. She was really thrilled with a "singing Grobie" thing from that Gabba Gabba show, so it looks like the noise from that thing will be pissing me off for weeks to come. At least her mum has her all afternoon tomorrow, so I won't have to deal with the fallout of constant operation of the toy.

So thanks a bundle there, Eshel!! Not only did my puppet suck, but now I know I'm no good at creative construct...all thanks to you and your awesome puppet skills! (Or 'skillz', who knows how the kids talk these days.) You owe me forty bucks for making me think puppets were a good idea!!

Anyway, that's my story for the day. Maybe if he's feeling extra helpful, Esh could give me some pointers as to how one would make a puppet that isn't scary or dangerous to handle...?? Thanks for the inspiration, buddy. You are the better builder of puppet-y things. Maybe I'll try again in the near future...or maybe I'll save myself the hastle and just buy the kid a pre-made puppet.

Yup. That probably would have been smarter.

Thanks for reading,

-The Big Bad