Most people despise hospital food, but not Terrance J. Wilcox. The 59-year-old Sheboygan, Wisconsin resident was such a huge fan of the fare at Sheboygan Memorial Medical Center - which for some reason does not have a Yelp! page - that he figured out a free way to get there.

Instead of just, like, getting an Uber, Mr. Wilcox on three separate occasions dialed 911 complaining of chest pains and hopped a ride to Memorial in the back of an ambulance, or as he must of thought of it, a “noisy food taxi.” But eventually, people caught on to his games.

Firefighters called Sheboygan police to Mr. Wilcox’s apartment Monday to file a complaint for misuse of the 911 service. It seems Mr. Wilcox’s M.O. was to call 911, hitch a ride to the hospital, eat the seemingly amazing food, flirt with the nurses, and curse at other staff for presumably not being hot nurses. Unfortunately, Mr. Wilcox flew a little too close to the sun on his third go-around. Proud of his accomplishments, he began bragging to staff that he didn’t actually have chest pains, saying that police “made” him go to the emergency room, and topping it off with “I like you guys,” though he may have felt the hospital’s happy hour left a little lacking.

Surprisingly unflattered by the compliment, hospital staff informed police that waiting on Mr. Wilcox’s meals took time away from caring for a newborn who was having trouble breathing. No one confirmed whether the baby had gotten a chance to sample the hospital’s breakfast burger.

Wilcox is facing one misdemeanor count of disorderly conduct, which carries a penalty of 90 days jail time and fines up to $1000, if convicted.