The Italian woman I was dating (who got ripped on by the comedian I took her to) and I broke up.  I expect we'll still be platonic friends, but we're too different.

What's more, I was pretty much done discussing how our asshole ex-spouses had fucked out our families and was ready to start talking about what was happening between us.  She wasn't on board.  With all the shit that's been going on in my life and with my kids, it's odd to me that I was the one that was ready to move on sooner and it was a deal breaker that she wasn't.

Now that I'm pretty much ready to be social and meet people, it seems like my dance card is full.  A reasonably attractive guy that's sober, employed, has wit, doesn't play headgames, and does right by his children is a hot commodity. 

I'm kind of dating three women now.  I've made no promises of exclusivity to anybody.  I don't lie to people, even with half truths or by ommision.  I haven't implied my relationship with anybody is other than casual.  Yet still I'm bothered by the ethics of what I'm doing. 

It's odd that after all the swinger blogs I've written, that I'm really a monogamous person at heart.  I'd rather have one person that I can pay all of my attention to.  Soon, I'm going to have to pull the plug on a couple of these relationships before it gets complicated or I hurt somebody's feelings.  I've really only gotten physical with one woman, but I can tell the other two are interested.  It's likely that something is going to happen with one of them on Sunday and the other is in Arizona this weekend, but she said she wishes she could get together with me.  I knew I had a moral issue going when I was baking cookies with the kids, took a picture of what we were doing, and group texted it to all three of them.  I then had a text conversation with all three of them while baking.

The girl I've gotten physical with is a valkyrie.  Seriously.  She's 6'3" tall.  I'm 6'1" and barefoot, face to face, my eyes come up to her nose.  What's more, is she's got long legs proportionately to her body so her waist is noticably higher than mine.  She was born and raised in Germany.  She speaks four languages fluently and has a German accent.  I'm not going to lie, it's kind of a turn on.  She's not a stick woman like many tall women.  She's not fat either.  She has a pleasant, womanly shape.  She's got a great smile.  I'm not a fetishist, but I have to admit, there's a certain appeal to being with a tall woman.  Troll-wife is literally 12 inches shorter than her.  She's got a daughter who's grown up and out of the house.

The sweet girl I've dated is also a teacher.  She's a speech therapist during the summer.  She's just recently started dating again too.  Her husband was an addict and was abusive.  Her kids, like mine, aren't fully recovered.  Her daughter is 12 and relieved by the divorced and her son is 16 and blames mom for dad not being around anymore.  He doesn't have the whole story about dad's addiction problem.  She's really, really sweet.  She's 5'7" and is very, very fit.  She, like I, has gone overboard on running and the gym as a coping mechanism for the family disintegrating.  I went from 250 to 190 and now I'm back up to 200.  But that weight I'm gaining is all in my chest and arms.  She's been split up longer than I and is as hard as a rock.  She's small chested too, which is a novelty considering that troll-wife and the other women I've been with have all been very top-heavy.  There's been some hugging and kissing, not exactly chaste, but nothing serious has occured.  But, God help me, I sure want it to.  We've got a lot in common.  Her troll-husband is almost homeless and has been unemployed for 18 months.  There's trouble brewing there.

I've got a date on Sunday with the wild girl.  I've met her for coffee once (where I kissed her goodbye afterwards) and we've been texting a lot.  She's got grown up kids.  She drinks.  She smokes.  She parties.  She's very extroverted.  She's 5'8" and has a nice figure.  She's really, really blonde.  She's very fair and has blue eyes.  Her hair is so light, you can hardly see her eyebrows.  She's into physics.  She doesn't have a degree in it, but the minute she found out I did, she immediately started interrogating me about M-Theory, quantum uncertainty, and parallel universes.  She's got more than a layman's interest and is VERY enthusiastic about it.  I know it's sick, but that's a turn on for me.

I've never been a player (playa?) and don't plan on starting now.  Even when I was doing the group sex thing, that was something my wife and I were doing together and would still consider any sexual activity without the other present to be infidelity.  I don't lie.  I just don't do it.  It's too much of a hassel.  I know, in my heart, that I might not be the best person to make an emotional investment in considering what's going on in my life.  There's no chance I'd take troll-wife back at this point, so that's not the problem.  I don't cry myself to sleep.  I function well in daily life.  But I realize that I'm still emotionally damaged.  It's good for my self esteem to be getting all of this positive attention from different women.  But I know, intellectually, that there's danger here.

My dating is being facilitated by troll-wife actually, on occasion, volunteering to do things with the kids.  My mother-in-law is also asking to take the kids out too.  Whenever one of them takes the kids, I call the valkyrie, if she's busy I call the sweet girl, and if she's busy I call the wild one.  Sometimes I make plans with one of them and set up kid care.  If I'm meeting one during the day, for just a couple hours, I let my daughter babysit my son.  When I'm not with one of the girlfriends, I spend 100% of my time with the kids.  They come with me to play discgolf every morning.  We go to a different park every day.  We do some kind of baking or food project every day.  They're doing pretty well.

So, am I going to go to Hell?  Is this common behavior?  I've been out of circulation for so long, I'm not sure what's SOP for dating.  I'm ready for some feedback from the peanut gallery.