Is anyone alarmed at the number of quakes we've had recently? First Haiti, then Japan, then Chile, and now Mexico.

Some would claim it's due to plate tectonics but the smart people know the truth. The real culprit is global warming, I mean climate change. It's true! Just type "climate change causes earthquakes" into your favorite search engine and marvel at the spectacle.

Hell, I read an article in Scientific American (Scientific American!!!) that climate change causes kidney stones so why shouldn't I believe that it could cause earthquakes and volcanic eruptions? Think about it.

If only Al Gore would make a film about it so we could get the word out and people would take it seriously. Where are you Al Gore? We need you!