Two men were on a business class flight to Pittsburgh. They happened to be sitting next to each other, and both happened to have a black eye.

The first man says, "Well, I suppose I'll tell my story first. You see, when I went to order my ticket, the girl being the counter was this lovely 18 year old blond with huge tits. I meant to say, 'I'd like a ticket to Pittsburgh," but I blurted out, 'I'd like a picket to Tittsburgh,' and she belted me one!"

The other man says, "Well, my story is very similar. You see, this morning at breakfast, I had meant to say to my wife, 'Honey, would you please pass the sugar," but what I had blurted out was, 'You bitch! You ruined my life!'"