While jogging slowly up a steep hill, I got cheered on by the driver of the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile.

Preface: I live in the meth valley of the Midwest so this isn’t surprising. I was in Walmart and I saw this older woman (~65 years old) and she didn’t have a shirt or a bra on. Instead… she took her very stretchy pants and lifted them up above her very saggy breasts forming a sort of a jumper/romper and just went on her way. That’s not something I expected or wanted to see

Worked as a waiter and after we finished one night a drunk man was walking down The street. One of my coworkers recognised him and asked if he was The german opera singer doing an show in The city. He answerd yes and asked if we would like to hear him sing. So he gave us a 3 min private concert in The middle of the night drunk of his ass.

At around 3 am, I saw a man rollerblading through the lobby of the Ritz Carlton. I could not believe the hotel staff were just letting him get away with this but no one even attempted to stop him. I ended up getting on the elevator behind him. The man was Jim Carrey.

On vacation in London my wife and I were waiting for a train in a tube station. Two trains arrived at the station before ours showed up. As a native New Yorker, I was comforted to see that pigeons live in subway stations everywhere. The first train pulls into the station and the doors open. As people enter and exit the train, one pigeon flutters down from the ceiling, lands on the platform and calmly walks onto the train like he’s off to work or something. My wife and I laugh about this a little as the doors closed and the train pulls away from the station. The second train pulls into the station, the doors open, and people shuffle out. After a moment a different pigeon walks out of this train and then flutters up to spot vacated by the first pigeon. Anyway, seems like London pigeons have the tube pretty much figured out.

I saw a car that instead of paint, was covered in short brown fur. Never seen anything like it since lol

When i was working nights on security I saw two cats getting chased by a rat. I questioned life for a brief moment.

I once took the Chunnel from London to Paris, first time ever doing so, or even being in France for that matter. As I was walking through the station a dude ran up to me and started quacking like a duck. I still wonder how that dude is doing two years later…

Neutering a dog the other day, he appeared to be a cryptorchid – that is, one normal testicle, and one not descended, retained somewhere in the abdomen. Well, we can still neuter these – in fact, it’s even more important to do so, since the retained one can later develop cancer if left behind – so, into the abdomen I went, looking for that retained testicle, which I was expecting to find somewhere between the kidney and inguinal ring. Found a uterus.

I worked at a high functioning casino as a cocktail server a few years back. This lady came up to me and asked me if I wanted to see something cool. Me not knowing what to expect says sure why not? This woman proceeds to pull a purple rag out of her bra and begin to unfold it. I start to hear little chirps coming from the rag… this woman pulled a baby chicken out of her bra in the middle of a casino and let me pet it! She then, folded the rag back up, stuffed the baby chicken back in her bra, and told me not to tell anyone…. I told EVERYONE

I used to work next door to a mini-golf course, and the window of our drive-thru looked out over the golf course. One day I’m working the drive thru and look out the window to see four people golfing in full fursuits

A guy walked into my business with a mastadon tusk – asked if I was interested in buying.

In the parking lot of a concert in the 80’s, a guy with a big blond fro stripped down and simulated intercourse with the windshield of his Chevelle. Then he dismounted and strutted around like a chicken. Then, more windshield coitus. Then, chicken. Windshield, chicken windshield, chicken, ambulance.

I saw a wedding being held in a parking lot. Instead of rings they had gold spike bracelets and the bride had a YOLO tramp stamp gleaming above her jean shorts.

Trail riding up in a fairly isolated part of north central Washington State when three emus ran out of the trees. Horses were not impressed. Those birds lived up there for several years menacing anyone who came around.

This was probably someone else’s “you don’t see that every day” but this one day was the hottest recorded in the city. I was walking down a secluded trail but had to stop at a bench just to cool down. Then this really tall black guy was sitting in a motorized chair with a foot cast. He was really chill since he was smoking a joint and asked if I wanted a lift so I sat on one of the arm rests and away we go. It was a short ride but he gave me a hit of his joint and figured shit, why not? This has to be the most bizarre situation I’ve ever been in. We passed an old lady then it hit me, like “of you know. We’re in the most affluent part of the city and a black and brown guy are cruising through this scenic path smoking a joint on a motorized chair. Just your average day in the city or something.”

Driving home one day down our old, suburban Atlanta street of ranch-style homes, my mom and I saw a full ass peacock just walking down the middle of the road.

Tire flying off the truck in front of you, aiming in your direction. Hits a small pot hole bounces high misses you entirely. Thank goodness, must of had a horseshoe up my ass that day!