“More stupid than crazy. One of the programmers on my team was sitting at his desk looking at porn. And this is cubicle land. No offices. My Director walked into the area to talk to me and saw it. He lost a $110K job for looking at porn on his computer at work.”

“I was a bartender/bar manager. This guy came in one night and said he was an aspiring DJ and asked if we would consider hiring him to come in just on Sunday nights to DJ for us. He said we wouldn’t have to pay him at first, he would just take tips and we could renegotiate after he helped to build up our Sunday night crowd. He lasted less than 3 months. He drove away so much business and I got SO many complaints. He played the same songs every week and when people made requests (for commonly known songs), he had no idea who they (the musicians) were. I had to fire someone who was working for free. He was a nice guy, which is the only reason he lasted as long as he did.”

“A guy shaved/trimmed off his pubes and left them scattered across a shared desk in a shared office. When confronted, he pulled a George Costanza: “Oh, is that frowned upon?”

“I work for a hotel. Had to fire 2 separate employees on 2 different occasions for letting people in vacant rooms to smoke crack and steal from the rooms.”

“In the early 2000’s I managed a coffee shop that required the customers’ names to be put on the cup. One guy looked like he was doing it but upon closer inspection on some cups he was writing an IP address. Turns out he was running an illegal sports book out of the shop.”

“A client called complaining about our hero trying to sell him golf clubs out of the trunk of his car.”

“I worked at a retail store and found one of my coworkers was using the company iPad (that we used to play music and order lunches) to go on Craigslist and search for hookups. She didn’t even bother to delete the search history.”

“One of my ER nurses was chasing another down the hall with a scalpel in her hand screaming at the top of her lungs “I’m going to cut you bitch!”

“We had someone fall asleep at his desk with a lit cigarette in his hand. In a office full of cubicles like maybe… 6-7 years ago? Smoking wasn’t legal anywhere indoors let alone in an office building lmao. And the first time he wasn’t even fired. He was fired when it happened again!”

“Fired a guy for looking to pay someone to cast black magic on the owner and the owner’s family to bewitch them into giving him a raise and, ironically, never firing him. Only reason I found out was because he asked someone else in the office for help in finding a witch doctor to cast the spells and word got round. No one wanted to be in the same room as him after that.”

“Years ago, at a lumber company. Had a guy, less than two hours after he started on his first day, pick up his car with a forklift and stand underneath it to see what was rattling when he drove.”

“I work at an art studio where we teach classes and sell pottery that our artists make for others to paint. I’m one of the artists and the manager. I started getting a funny feeling about one of my employees.. she wasn’t doing anything blatantly wrong, just seemed to work really slowly sometimes, request insignificant but kinda odd schedule changes, and have different break habits from the other staff. I started feeling like she was stealing but this is a really small business so I didn’t have her on camera or any way to really prove it… Until she accidentally sent me a video of herself painting pieces that I MADE from her home!”

“Fired a high schooler because his girlfriend kept showing up and they would disappear behind the racks. I told him his girlfriend was banned trying to not fire him and she kept sneaking back.”

“My coworker at a coffee shop. Told a customer she didn’t feel like making x drink and she should go elsewhere.”

“Had an employee that was going to get fired for simply showing up late constantly with no legit reason. During the term meeting she tells me another employee cut the brake lines in her car – it’s obvious this was to save her from being fired. She didn’t realize that something like that gets cops involved. She was termed, and then detectives showed up to her house to get statements. Of course, no evidence of lines being cut and now she’s dealing with police for making false statements.”

“They stole a $3 bottle of wine that could have easily put on the “house” check for employees. Prep cook stole a 25lb bag of onions.”

“Dumbass stole a $100 bill out of the register at the end of his FIRST shift alone on register.”

“At a retail job, we had a kid come in and punch in for the day then go home. Would come back at quittin’ time and punch out.”

“Had to fire a guy for coming to work high on meth and getting lost in a closet while painting it. Asked what the deal was and was told”shhhh I am having a conversation”. That was his last day lmao.”