I guess somebody at my apartment complex got caught cheating.

Thanksgiving dinner was a hit, and many helped with the dishes. Found my chefs knife like this today…

A student in my class tried using 4 devices to cheat on a quiz, but somehow managed to get the wrong answer on all of them.

Took a late lunch to find I forgot to put PB or J on my PB&J.

Got a call that said the field trip was running late due to a “bus malfunction”. This was not what I was expecting.

My mom washed my favorite sweater… is this THE LEWK?!

When you work at a toilet paper factory but they expect you to wipe with this.

I am a menace to society. My dumb pregnancy brain accidentally ordered my husband a burrito with NO TORTILLA :’(

Was woodworking a ring and checked the size. Now it isn’t coming off.

Removing a cheap mirror glued to the wall, only to find an even cheaper mirror glued to the wall beneath it.

Expensive mistake.

My mom set her oven to self not remembering that she had silicone rack guards in there fun fact if heated high enough silicone vaporizers and does this to your oven AND families coming out for Thanksgiving today.

Bought the nicest car I’ve ever had two days ago. Just found this.

Received my package from FedEx with urine all over it. I guess I forgot to pay the extra fee to not have my package pissed on.

Went to the barber for a haircut. Tipped well. Went home and noticed this…

My fortune cookie is just an ad for Bitcoin.

“My homework was…” Teacher: “Yeah right.”

I spent over an hour trying to cover my windows before realizing that the second panel has a slightly different pattern, and that the squares don’t line up.

Lawnmower broke halfway through, now it has a landing strip instead of a Brazilian…

Ate half of the bag before I actually looked at them.

Found this in the washing machine in my building.

Friend lost his wallet earlier this week – found it today magnetized to his car.