“This glass is completely dry, the drops are part of the design.”

“This stack of consoles at my friend’s house.”

“My wife found this motorcycle parked in the cart return today.”

“My hamburger with extra onion.”

“Was just trying to help the driver.”

“Total came to $6.66 and I was charged a 1¢ Satan Avoidance Fee.”

“When you put a load of laundry in the wash but forget one sock.”

“We’ve had this “home” sign for 7 years, new friend comes over and points out it actually says “hame”…”

“I got an empty hot pocket.”

“I bought a cup of drink from Starbucks and this is the amount of ice in it.”

“How my boyfriend eats burgers.”

“It’s a boy!! (Blue stuff is not ours, yard is)”

“My cat threw my IPad i got last week off my bed, the case was supposed to come tomorrow.”