There was a woman in a local FB group whose entire personality was being a "combat veteran wife", and would speak over actual vets and claimed all women who claimed SA were liars. So I did what any female veteran would do and hired a sex worker to seduce her husband, and paid for it with my disability out of principal.

Slashed the tires on my neighbor's Lambo because he yelled at me for riding my bike across his yard. I was 10 at the time and didn't realize Lambo tires are $1,000 each. I never got caught. Still don't regret it and it's well past the statute of limitations so even if he somehow finds out there's nothing he can do about it now.

Turned a close friend into the fish and game. He would poach mountain lions and bears. His whole family would literally shoot them and leave them. He would brag about it. I couldn’t stand it and felt that I needed to stop him. He’s in prison and so is his uncle. I know I ruined his life but he was literally killing so many mountain lions and bears.

Got into a car accident and had to stay with my mom for a couple days to figure out what to do. Went back to my apartment (I had two roommates) and everything was missing from my room. Long story short one of my roommates had everything hidden in her room. I called and told her the things were missing from my room and she came up with a lie that a couple girls came to look at my room (I was moving out bc of the accident, long story) and that they must have taken my things. She had everything I owned. Including my grandmothers perfume bottles, stuffed to the back of her closet, under her bed, behind her dresser etc. So I packed all of my stuff up. Then took a giant black garbage bag and stuffed as much of her closet in it as I could. Took it to the middle of nowhere, dug a hole and burnt it. She called screaming at me that her stuff was missing. I told her the two girls must have come by and taken her stuff too.

When my father was dying and in pain I was the one who told the doctors he had been through enough and we couldn't see him suffer anymore. Doctor injected him with something, I assume a morphine mega dose and he passed peacefully moments after. Euthanasia may not be legal in UK but compassionate doctors know what's what. I don't regret it because my pa made me promise I would have his back when he got sick or old. I'm sad he got sick and never got to get old.

My sister and I went to the same school, she was a year older. This guy was making her life hell and she was crying a lot, which was (still is) really, really unlike her. After weeks of this, my mom told me to beat him up and I would not be in trouble at home if I got in trouble at school for doing so. The next day I saw my opportunity when I was in class and watched him walking in the hallway go into the guys bathroom. I immediately asked for permission to go too. I opened the door quietly and he was taking a p**s at a urinal. I Sparta kicked his a*s into the urinal and then just beat the s**t out of him, pissing on himself and all. I told him to leave my sister alone or it'd happen again. My sister came home happy that day and never had another problem. She didn't know this happened for about 20 years. Not a shred of regret. I didn't get in trouble. To his credit, he kept quiet. I did too. Nothing happened for those roughly 20 years, we just never told her. Up until that day, she had been telling him to stop, etc. Just let her think that worked I guess. She was happy. It faded in time until some family holiday party in the last couple of years where we were telling old stories. We laughed, she hugged me, and that was that. She's had my back plenty in life too.

A neighbor like 10 years ago was neglecting their dog badly in the heat. The dog escaped often and ended up at the shelter a lot. One day she jumped the fence and got her tie-out cable stuck on the fence. (She was not in danger of choking.) Neighbor put her on a 3-foot-long cable tied to a doorknob, no water, 90 degree day. I let some kind folks steal her, watched the whole thing and said nothing to stop them.

I worked at a vet clinic as a tech for a long time. A lady came in to put her husband’s cat to sleep (husband had the cat prior to the marriage.) She wanted to euthanize the cat because it “slept too much and was old”. The cat was old, but she was also perfectly healthy. Lady told us that if we didn’t put the cat down she’d find someone else who would. We said okay, we agree to put the cat down, charged her for euthanasia and for cremation (she didn’t want ashes back thankfully). Lady leaves and we don’t put the cat down. We keep her as a clinic cat and she lived several more years in good health and happiness before dying of old age. The vet would joke that the euthanasia and cremation costs were “adoption fees”. Anytime the lady would come back to the clinic we’d hide the cat in a back room and snicker the whole time.

Some people were bullying the new mate at school, and one day he was crying on the floor. I asked him for the name of the boy who made him cry, and I punched the guy, his nose was bleeding. Now, "the new mate" is still my friend, after 10 years !

My big sister used to casually hookup with this Russian guy who's family was absolutely loaded. He always seemed nice and I hoped they'd become more so he could stick around. Well, one day my sister had a pregnancy scare. She was late on her period for a whole week, she told the guy about it and whatnot, and she was planning on getting a test later that evening. As soon as she told him he completely flipped his script and became a belligerent racist. I think racist is the right term? He basically screamed about how he couldn't taint his blood line with "filthy American blood" and called all us Americans stupid and disgusting. He went off the handle and demanded she get an abortion or he'll make sure the baby doesn't live. Yeah. She took a test and it came back negative thankfully, and then showed me the messages. He offered to pay for it and s**t, and she asked "Sis, would I be an a*****e if I took the money anyways?" And I said "in any other situation I'd say yes, but this dude is an absolute prick and isn't hurting for cash. Tell him its $600 not $400" So like 3 days later we met him in his rich a*s neighborhood, he was a cold heartless jerk and just handed her the $600 cash. We left that day for a girls trip out of state (: hooting and hollering in my sisters convertible with the top rolled down, I felt like I was on top of the world. F**k you, Nikkoli

I don’t know if this was “dark”, but it was definitely s**tty and I don’t regret it. I was in a relationship that I was too afraid to leave at the time but I knew it was abusive. My ex had been trying to alienate me from my brother, friends and parents. At this point, only my parents and one male friend still had close, uninterrupted connection to me. My male friend was my drummer in my band and I am a full time musician, so he was around a lot. My partner would berate me, constantly accusing me of cheating on him when I wasn’t, scream at me, try to force me to get a “real job” so I wouldn’t need to deal with my music friends anymore. I was on the verge of suicide and a little bit insane. And one day I said “f**k it, if I’m gonna constantly get accused of s**t that I didn’t do, I might as well actually be doing it” So I had sex with the drummer. Finally left the piece of s**t a few months later. The drummer and I are getting married next year. No regrets.

When I was 13 my very abusive and extremely drunken father was swinging at my dog trying to punch him. I kicked the old bastard down a flight of stairs breaking every rib on his left side, some twice and puncturing a lung. Then I went right back to watching Dukes of Hazzard. About 5 hours later, my mom came home she asks where dad was, I told her he was laying on the basement floor. Why? He's drunk, of course, he must of fell. She went down there and b**ched at him for about 20 minutes. But he was mostly unconscious. Then she called my uncle to come and help me carry him upstairs. My dog wouldn't let my uncle anywhere near the old man despite their earlier altercation. So I had to carry him up by myself (I was a big kid). Anyone with even a tiny bit of first aid knowledge (me, from Scouts) would know not to do that. I had to sling him in a blanket over my shoulder Santa Claus style. He then spent the next 4 days getting sober enough (not sober) to go to the hospital. There he was properly diagnosed and treated and his lung drained and reinflated. While he was able to smoke, yep, smoke right there in his hospital bed! they did not provide alcohol on the hospital menu. So he went into withdrawal. Delirium Tremors and all. Kept screaming "Get that gah dam HORSE off of my bed! How did that horse get in here?" Used to (in his mind) drive the bed around his old neighborhood like a Packard Motor Car and describe the sites to people. That lasted about a week. Then, and I don't know how this works, the doctors refused to release him from the hospital and moved him to the psych ward. He spent two months or so in there being treated for addiction. During that time no children, dogs or wives were physically, mentally or emotionally abused at our house. Not once. For the first time in about 30 years. Eventually he was discharged and much to everyone's shock and utter disbelief...he never drank again! Or beat his wife. Or abused his children. His grandchildren absolutely worshipped him and competed for his favor. He was kind and generous and a great source of wisdom and humor for them. In time, they named their own sons after him and have his name tattooed on their flesh. Ultimately he died of cancer. And when he did, I held him in my arms and looked him in the eyes so he wouldn't be scared or die alone. I was his primary caregiver for the last 7 years of his life. And I have Zero Regrets about my actions that day.

Had to make the choice to take my dad off of life support after he got Covid this year. He was sedated for a couple of weeks and one of his lungs collapsed and I couldnt watch him fall apart anymore. My dad was a bulky dude. Constantly did a lot of outdoor work and to see him bone skinny and have no muscle left killed me and I knew even if he somehow got through it, he would have been so miserable and depressed in that state he was in. I don’t regret it. I think it was the right thing to do by him. I’ll never not miss him though. That was my buddy

Being an addict. It was the darkest time of my 30 years on this earth. I don’t regret it in the sense that I was happy as an addict, but it made me the strongest, most resilient person I know. 6 years sober and counting!

Paid £250 quid for a horse off an acquaintance that had been suffering from various ailments, been a bit neglected and couldn't even lay down to sleep any more and then moved the horse to a different yard and had her quietly put down a few days later to end her suffering.

In middle school, there was this group of boys that would corner me in the hallway and try to scare me. I was the perfect target for these little bastards. I was short, skinny, and had (and still have) and anxiety disorder. One day I just had enough, and asked a friend if I could have an extra pencil, sharpened it as much as I could, and when I saw one of them in the hallway, I stabbed the f**k out of his leg. Sh**head got what he deserved.

I called the police on my mom and had her submitted to a mental hospital and left her there. She needed to know after everything my love WAS conditional and she needed to get her s**t together. She didn’t, and I’m sure she hasn’t forgiven me since.

Signed someone up online for home Mormon visits and added in comments to not give up if I was rude at first, I really did want to be helped deep down.

Ghosted a guy who was supposed to be my friend. The friendship had started off fine, we became close very quickly... But then the cracks started yawning into weird black abysses. His stories didn't match up to reality. He always had a new story to tell, and it was always fantastical. He would call me at 3 am and just sob about how his bones hurt and he could see "the shadow man". I was 19 and very confused, very afraid. I couldn't deal with it, and I didn't feel safe, and he never listened if I tried to help him through whatever was going on with him. So I just. Stopped picking up the phone. I stopped agreeing to meet him. I disappeared from his life. A year later, a mutual friend and an ex of mine told me he had died of bone cancer. I was f*****g devastated. It traumatized me for years thinking that he needed me and I ditched him and he died alone. It to this day crumbled how I navigate boundaries now. Five years after that, I was told that it was all a lie, and he had never had cancer. Or he had it and was in a coma. Or he moved away. I don't know the truth. But I do know that cutting those two liars out of my life was the right choice to make.

Putting my ex's breast milk in her parents coffee. They were supercritical people and I was stay at home dad which was very cool and a privilege actually. Anyway, parents in law came to visit and the usual snarky comments were really pissing me off. My girls mother used to produce loads of breast milk and was always expressing off lots to bottle and keep in the fridge for later feeds... So I offered to make coffee and added the breast milk to it for the parents. It made me very happy and I suppose it is a little bit dark.

I used to work with an openly racist guy in the army. He would regularly make racist jokes and statements like telling one of our black soldiers that the "Colored Bathrooms were over there." I reported him to EO like I was supposed to, but because he was friends with the EO rep nothing happened. So I went on 4chan and posted his name and social security number on a "If you hate them Post their info" threads. He got his identity stolen. No regrets.

Stabbed my own hand and blamed it on a kid I hated in kindergarten. He was a bully and would constantly flip over the girls' skirts as well as steal my f*****g food, so I decided he gotta go. Got him expelled from that school.

When i was a teenager and new on the internet chatrooms in the years 2000-2004, i was a frequent visitor to a Dragonball Z RP chatroom. I was a young teen with zero concept of sex, relationships, etc. I decided i wanted to try cross-playing as a male character and didn't want to be one of the main cast, so i picked Zarbon (i know, wtf). But then a girl fell for me. Backstepping a little, through the course of RP in the main chat room, a girl RPing as a self-insert DBZ character would send me DMs asking for personal advice, telling me about herself, her life, her struggles with her parents, her friends, etc. We became friends, but i was nervous about privacy and worried that identifying myself as a girl would be seen as deceptive, so in order to keep up the façade that i was a guy, I made up a persona. I became Travis, a High school senior and member of a garage band who was emancipated from his parents and living in an apartment with a roommate. Analyzing it now, I suspect it was an effort to appear as an authority, but still in a relatable age range. Over months, she continued to confide in Travis and we Roleplayed in public chat, but had a private pseudo-relationship going on including cyber-sex and "pillowtalk". She confessed her love to Travis, and I knew I had to let her down, because I was actually a 14-15 year old girl, which I suspect she was as well. I continued the friendship for a few months more, but keeping a more friendly distance an she seemed to have backed off the idea that we would be a couple or together, but was telling me I was her only friend, the only one she could confide in, etc. So i encouraged her to go to school functions and meet other people because "Travis" couldn't be there for her IRL. She started to talk eventually about some new friends and joining an anime club in her neighborhood. I began to tell a story about Travis had met a girl in his real life and they were starting a relationship, etc. We continued to talk and i peppered in stories about my girlfriend in order to keep reminding her that we couldn't be together, which she took well. When I was confident that she was good to go forwards with her new relationships and i realized we'd been "friends" for like 2 years, slowly Travis stopped logging in. I would log in from time to time under another account just to see if she kept coming to the chatroom, and eventually I left for good. I think about her often, even 20 years later now, and wonder how she's doing. Travis became the basis for my favorite D&D character eventually and when i think about his origin, I think about that girl and i feel bad for leading her on, but i hope i gave her fond memories.

Ex-stepfather had verbally and physically abused me for 12 years before I finally left the house for good. The last day I was there, my step-piece of s**t basically admitted to having feelings for me, choked me, and screamed at me for hours. I left through my bedroom window. For five months I avoided that house until ex-stepfather got a hold of my new phone number and texted me non stop about how I’m breaking my mom’s heart by not coming to visit. So I texted back that I’ll come by one day soon after work. When I got there, he opened the door, and I cracked his face open with a baseball bat. The reason why the police weren’t called was because my step-a*****e was already wanted for trafficking substances. The pandemic started a couple months after and my mom decided to move out and let the POS stay in my childhood home. Mom and I are in contact and she goes to therapy. I also go to therapy.

My football coach and history teacher screwed over my uncle, the assistant coach really bad. After that year I stopped playing football and started f*****g with my teacher/old coach. The first thing I did was change words in his computer to type other words. I focused on all of the transition words first. Like the, and, it, etc. whenever he would type them it would change to some pretty gross things. This was about 14 years ago and I’ll never forget watching him freak out when the projector was up and he was trying to give a lesson. The next thing I did is change the directory of all of his applications to a website that had three old dudes banging in the shower. It was gross as hell and the funny thing is whenever you tried to exit the page, it would move. It was a trolling site that you couldn’t get out of unless you hard shut down your computer. Oh man, the good old days.

I used to work in an office in the US Midwest that shared a campus with a factory. The bathrooms in the office were "factory style"; very large with many stalls, urinals, and an attached locker room. One day, a while after lunch, I went into the men's room for my afternoon constitutional. Moments after I was seated, the tornado alarm went off. Within seconds, the men's room was filled with every person in my office, as the men's room was the designated tornado shelter. I sat, paralyzed, for a few minutes; sweat on my brow, my pants around my ankles, a torpedo loaded in the tube, and suddenly surrounded by a few hundred coworkers. I realized that no one knew who was in the assorted stalls. With that realization, I unleashed a monster s**t. The kind that stinks up entire houses. I could hear my colleagues around me, groaning and gasping in disgust. Some of them sounded like they were choking back vomit. One of them called out for Jesus. I knew they were packed in shoulder-to-shoulder, but I had plenty of room to myself. When I finished, I didn't flush, knowing it would give me away as the source. I let them all stew in my stink for what seemed like forever. People coughed, gasped and swore. Finally, the all clear was sounded, and everyone flooded out into the halls. I waited just a moment, flushed, and when I exited the stall, the bathroom was empty. I washed my hands and returned to work as if nothing had happened. The next day, the consensus amongst the team on the floor was that a coworker, Daryl, was the likely culprit of the stinkening. I kept my mouth shut, and years later, when Daryl retired, people were still talking about the time he took a s**t during a tornado and made us all smell it. Daryl was a lazy piece of s**t. I regret nothing, and I'd do it again, given the chance.

Smear poison ivy on an a**holes car door handle.

Sneaking out in all black and going to my neighbors house in the dead of night to carefully place a nail behind his back tire *he was an absolute piece of s**t who had no regard for any of his neighbors or for anyone, he absolutely deserved a flat tire, I don't regret it in the slightest*

Serving rude people decaf coffee when they asked for regular. I have no regrets.

Left my ex, knowing he would be homeless when I kicked him out. Grabbed up all of his things and dumped them at the store he was working at with his friends. Told him I never wanted to see him again, and left (and blocked him on all forms of social media) and I haven't seen him since.

Turned off the lights in the school bathroom and left while people were in the stalls.

When I was 16 I was in an abusive relationship with a 21 year old who lied to me about his age. He was a drug dealer and had a giant stash of a white powder drug (unsure which one) and weed. He was supposed to sell it and give his source a cut. When he passed out drunk, I dumped it all out in the dumpster. I turned his AC off even though it was summer. Then I stole his camera which had proof of his abusive nature to use as blackmail in case I needed it, handcuffed one of his hands to the bed board, and threw his phone across the room where he could visibly see it but not get to it (not sure why he had handcuffs laying around?) Then I dumped ice water on him til he woke up. I smiled and said, "you messed with the wrong girl" and let him beg me in a somewhat stupor to undo his situation for 5 minutes before I left. The following week he texted me and said the police were searching for him because a warrant had been put out for his arrest. Then he went to jail and I never heard from him again.

Rented an apartment space with a former coworker but it turned into a toxic situation. He was a legit alcoholic, lost his job, was in/out of the hospital due to his addiction, and overall just a horrible roommate. One day he took a huge s**t and didn’t flush the toilet. He was passed out after drinking all night. I took his toothbrush and scrubbed the toilet with all the s**t still in there and put it back. Next morning, I could hear him go to brush his teeth. He immediately gagged and started throwing up. Never said anything to me about it after.