“Didn’t realize one of my glove fingers broke until I was done dyeing my hair.”

“I accidentally branded Rachael Ray’s name on myself with one of her roasting trays.”

“A friend tried to toss the keys to me, and it got stuck to the roof piping.”

“I washed my hands and, apparently, there was water sitting close to the edge.”

“Overnight co-worker sent me this last night.”

“Someone’s got to come up with a better solution than making straws out of stuff that dissolves in liquid in 30 seconds.”

“The pharmacist put my card in the bag and stapled it.”

“I just wanted to open the closet.”

“There was a pen in the dryer.”

“Tan lines from the time I was living in Vietnam.”

“Why are people like this?”

“My dad spent all summer growing this watermelon only for it to be just rind and seeds.”

“Moved into this apartment with my girlfriend less than a month ago. Last night, the sky started falling.”

“Forgot I had a dentist appointment and didn’t have time to change. They think I’m crazy in the waiting room.”

“Wife made cupcakes, my 8-year-old ate the frosting.”

“Look at this misfit on my flight back home.”

“My friend’s phone fell and broke last night. This was the last picture it took as it hit the ground.”

“Made cake toppers for my wedding and forgot to check the oven’s temperature before putting my fiancée in...”

“My favorite wedding photo — I got a bubble in my eye while we were leaving.”

“My roof caved in last night.”

“A small crash revealed just how much makeup she had on.”

“He saw a squirrel. Dragged me through the mud.”

“Home alone, cleaning the roof and gutters when I heard a loud bang...”

“Someone left their bike under the wrong tree.”

“-25° outside. Heavy grocery bag. No gloves. Long chat with an old friend in a parking lot. Gravity.”

“My cat couldn’t get to his litter box because the toilet door was closed at night, so he spilled the litter bag himself and pooped on it...”

“Paid extra for a window seat. Got the one seat on the plane with a wall.”

“Do you guys know toner dust from a printer? It feels like liquid if you put enough of it in a zip bag.”

“My stress ball burst on me.”

“Happy Thanksgiving!”

“Had to finish my head and face with the leftover mini razor.”

“Bought a book on Amazon, and this is what I found in my mailbox when I got home.”

“ATM shut down with my card in it.”

“Had to give my daughter a bit of a haircut today.”

“So much for saving time with a round brush today.”

“Betty is an indoor cat. She was outside for 10 minutes.”