What you need is a PVC pipe, Heavy Metal File with Rasp and Double cut sides (file costs approx. 9$), 100 Grit sandpaper, Artist Oil Paint or Acrylic but it requires a seal to avoid chipping. Wire Brush (to clean file), and Dust mask.

Remove the shiny coating and ink print on the PVC face with the sandpaper. If the Ink is giving you trouble, give IT some trouble... with acetone. Your PVC should have a nice matte finish.

SAFETY REMINDER: Wear Dust Mask for this step

Use the rasp side of the file to shred the PVC surface. Pull the file in many directions to give it an organic look. If the file's teeth get clogged, use a wire brush to quickly clear them.

CAUTION: This step will make sharp ridges on the surface of the PVC. Try not to slide your knuckles along the pipe until you have smoothed it out.

Don't rush and take your time with getting the details your looking for.

Once you're happy with the texture, use the double cut (smoother side) of the file to remove the shavings and sharp ridges on the PVC.

Give the plastic a few extra rubs with the sandpaper.

Find a nice oil color you like for your PVC wood. Wipe it on with a rag, making sure to work it into all the new grooves.

You can use some faux finish techniques for extra texture, blotting the paint on in irregular patterns instead of bush strokes.

Let it dry. If you use Acrylic paint you will need to put a seal on it after it dries to keep it from chipping.

That's it. Now you can paint it, place it or anything you'd like.