Misc text - jokes

Big Trouble...

The population of this country is 300 million. 160 million are retired. That leaves 140 million to do the work. There are 85 million in...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

A Really Bad Day

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver...

By sk8infreek

Featured 17 years ago

Women Lightbulbs

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just the one, she stands on a chair and holds it while she waits for the whole world to...

By organo

Featured 17 years ago

Turkey and Shit

During Thanksgiving, little Johnny's parents were having friends and family over. While mom was in the kitchen, she accidentally cut herself...

By lildiggitty56

Featured 17 years ago

50 Cent

What did 50 Cent say when Eminem made him a sweater? Gee, you knit!

By boc1500

Featured 17 years ago

Michael Jackson Shopping

When is Michael Jackson's favorite time to shop? When boys pants are half off!

By swellfellow

Featured 17 years ago

Christmas Alphabet

Q: whats the difference between a Christmas alphabet and a regular alphabet? A: Noel

By bandgeek1303

Featured 17 years ago

Circular Logic

Two men are in court on drug charges. The judge says, If, over the weekend, you can persuade enough people to give up drugs, I’ll let you...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Yo mama

Yo mama so ugly she didn't get a birth certificate she just gt an apology letter from durex

By ScottishGem

Featured 17 years ago

Attention Racing Fans

Q: What do Dale Earnhardt and Pink Floyd have in common? A: Their last big hit was the wall.

By txhooligan

Featured 17 years ago

911 Knock Knock

- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - 9/11 - 9/11, who? - You said you'd never forget!!

By BassSpy

Featured 17 years ago

3 Vampires

3 vampires walk into a bar. The 1st one sits and orders a glass of hot blood, the 2nd sits and orders a glass of cold blood. When the 3rd one...

By lucky7007

Featured 17 years ago

Christopher Reeve

Q: What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve? A: Christopher Walken

By DocBrown

Featured 17 years ago

PMS

Q. Why do women call it PMS? A. Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Colonoscopy Comments

1. "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before! 2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?" 3. "Can you hear me NOW?" 4. "Are we...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

New Candy Bar

Theres a new candy bar coming out called The Michael Jackson. Its going to be white-chocolate with no nuts.

By ronfrom

Featured 17 years ago

Karate Chop

A little guy is sitting at a counter eating breakfast. A big guy walks in and hits the little guy. "That's a judo chop from Japan," he says, and...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Bodybuilder

Q: What do you call a bodybuilder with a big penis? A: A beginner.

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Fighting a Ghost

An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset. Upon making...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Good News

Doctor Nick walks into his office to talk to a patient. He looks at the patient and says: I have good news and bad news. Which would you...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Contempt of Court

A man was forced to take a day off from work to appear for a minor traffic summons. He grew increasingly restless as he waited hour after endless...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Train Station

This is a passenger announcement: The train on platform one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven and twelve has come...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Pope Flight

A shy gentleman was preparing to board a plane when he heard that the Pope was on the same flight. "This is exciting," thought the gentleman....

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Essays

Every year, English teachers from across the USA can submit their collections of actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays....

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Attorneys

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Misc text - jokes

Big Trouble...

A Really Bad Day

Women Lightbulbs

Turkey and Shit

50 Cent

Michael Jackson Shopping

Christmas Alphabet

Circular Logic

Yo mama

Attention Racing Fans

911 Knock Knock

3 Vampires

Christopher Reeve

PMS

Colonoscopy Comments

New Candy Bar

Karate Chop

Bodybuilder

Fighting a Ghost

Good News

Contempt of Court

Train Station

Pope Flight

Essays

Attorneys

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